On Resistance

This writing is about resistance, our struggle to fight what others want us to do. I learned early in my career that resistance is actually useful; it can tell you what people value.

You can then use the energy people have invested in resisting to a new purpose. When I first became a manager, I thought: ok, now I am in control; I can do what needs to be done. I did not think at first to check out what the resistance was all about.

Luckily, I had read Barry Steven’s book, Don’t Push the River. Barry was a Gestalt therapist who had worked closely with Fritz Perls. In the book she describes her journey to find a way to “go with the flow.”

Think about it, it takes tremendous energy to push against the flow of a stream, much more a river. What if that energy can be used in a way that goes with the flow?

So, by finding out what people actually wanted, rather than what they didn’t want, we were able to construct a plan that most people could invest their energy in.

So, whenever you find resistance to your ideas, plans, agenda, find out what the resistance is all about.

What do people really want, what do they value?

Now you are turning resistance into something positive.

And, you will think you are a genius